Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da Life Goes On...

La-La-La-La, Life Goes On: I'm ready to have some fun and start dating!  I'm practicing my flirting skills.
I had my first date this past Saturday -- at a Starbucks.  I was incredibly nervous...and it showed.  I could not make eye contact for any length of time! He commented that I seemed nervous. {Duh}  I told him the truth:  the last time I dated a person I did not know, I was 16 years old....that was 32 years ago...I'm a bit out of practice!  He quickly put me at ease and we chatted for 2 hours.

Shout out to friends and one of my sister's that checked on me via text during this date.  We had a bit of a chuckle 30 minutes in to our date when I got a text from my sister--I confessed to him that I had told a few people about our date, where I was going and they wanted to check on me, and ensure I was safe & OK.

I checked the time on my phone, and my screen lock is a picture of Jim & I.  He asked if that was my "ex" then quickly corrected himself to say husband.  Can you say: AWKWARD!
I've got to figure out how to balance that kind of awkward...a lot of my conversation in the "getting to know each other category" was me saying: when we were in Florida; when we were in Alaska, when we moved to Tennessee, our kids... I think I could be putting too much pressure on myself, it is what it is. 
For me, we will always exist.  That we shaped me into the person I am today...Jim and I grew up together and 30 years is a long time!  He will always be my husband. I suppose if it really bothers a guy, then he's not a guy for me?   This dating thing, while I think it could be fun, is rather complicated! At the age of 48, there's history, there's baggage.  I think I need Ann Landers or Miss Manners to offer up some advice.

That night I lost sleep wondering if I said too much, said too little, asked about him enough and allowed him to talk enough. Oh, my!  Teenager angst, again! I chatted with my daughter, who told me, "Yes, I was being a girl and it was cute!"  I must have done OK, we've talked on the phone a few times since.

I am pleased that I didn't automatically make comparisons between Jim and him.  I kind of worried that may happen.  What a relief to me that it didn't!

Life does go on, and this girl just wants to have some fun, finally!  So, if you know someone...