Note: Elizabeth called Jim, Daddy. Austin called Jim, Father.
Jim set such a good example of what a Daddy/Father should be: kind, patient (most the time), funny, always there for them, a man of integrity, of great faith, a man who kept his promises and while he always put the Lord first, his family was next! The joke in our house was that Jim was the Gospel, I was the Law...it was true! He was ever so much better in situations where patience and tact were necessary! We were a great parenting team, at least I like to think so.
While cleaning out the house in January, getting it ready to sell, I came across a box of Jim's stuff. OK, I came across many boxes of Jim's but this one in particular, oh, it was a treasure! Jim had a box full of things the kids had either made him, colored for him or as they got older, the cards they bought for him, notes they wrote him, notebooks of baseball stats, band programs --- all things that were from his kids and all of it meant something special to him.
I put this box aside, and about a month ago I began working on a scrapbook for each of the kids. I didn't want these precious things to stay in a box, hidden. I wanted the kids to see how very much Jim treasured what they gave him. I put together the scrapbooks (with some help from a friend, thanks Lorianne) and wrote them each a letter. As their Mom, it hurts my heart that they are grieving...I want to fix it, make it better, (like when I would kiss their owie and make it better) but I can't, not this time...I can only hold them, listen and pray.
I know that sharing these scrapbooks with the kids will probably bring even more sadness and tears to this day, this Father's Day. At the same time, these are precious memories. I believe they each need a tangible, physical reminder of just how much Jim loved them.
It's my hope that they treasure these books! I know today they may not see them as treasures, they will probably see them as painful. But, I also know, given time, they will come to appreciate these scrapbooks and share them with their own families and friends--and talk about their Daddy/Father with laughter and smiles instead of tears and grief...
I also have a journal, that is specific to "Memories of Jim that make me smile" --- I will be asking the kids to share their memories with me so I can add their memories to this journal. Another tangible, way to remember Jim, laugh and smile at all the good times we had as a family.
If you'd like to see what I put together, I've made a video of each scrapbook, the links are below.
Elizabeth's Scrapbook
Austin's Scrapbook
Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there! Hug your kids, Dad's, make certain they know how much you love them! For those whose Dad's are in heaven, I pray that today, of all days, you can spend some time remembering your Dad and that those memories fill your heart and make you smile!
A very special shout out to my niece, Jodi...she made me a scrapbook, pictures of Jim, and attached a note: " Aunt Edie, I made this scrapbook for you so you can have something to look at when you are sad or when you are thinking of Uncle Jim. 10,000 Reasons is a song and I put the lyrics in there. I learned the song at camp. I love you and miss you. Love, Jodi Bader xoxo"
